Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
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