I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
