just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I want a musical about memes.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
