I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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