so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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