im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
