look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
pop tarts are not kleenex
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
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