I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize