At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
