I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
