she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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