I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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