What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
