you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
