brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
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