Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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