My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize