turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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