i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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