Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Randomize
