for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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