The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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