Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
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You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
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It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now