That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Operation Purity has been aborted
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
