we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
