Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Randomize
