i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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