u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
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