It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
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Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
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Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize