we're blogging at a bar
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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