And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
