I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
