I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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