it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
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