Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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