I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
We left an ass print on the piano.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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