When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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