How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize