6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
