I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
And then he peed in my hair
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