and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
