Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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