the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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