Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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