so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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