I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
So much Jack, so little girl.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Randomize
