i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize
