Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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