and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.