is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
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