Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
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